Good Character May Not Be What You Think It Is

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Good Character May Not Be What You Think It Is

When you ask a group of players, “who has ever heard a coach say they’re looking for kids with good character?” You’ll see a room full of players all raising their hands.  We say it and they hear it. Often.

We’ve recently polled hundreds of players asking them “when you hear coaches talk about needing kids with good character, what are they specifically asking for?

Here are the three most common responses:

  • players who don’t get in trouble; legally, suspended at school, drugs, etc.
  • players who get good grades
  • players who are respectful

They aren’t wrong, but they aren’t fully correct either.

The Truth On What Coaches Want

Yes, all coaches want their players getting good grades,being respectful and not getting in trouble.  I’d argue because those three things are so obvious, it’s not what coaches are referring to when they say “we need good character.”  Of course they don’t want players like that, does that even need to be said?

The truth is, when coaches say we need kids with good character they are saying we need kids with “good character traits.”

Players, read that line again: The truth is, when coaches say we need kids with good character they are saying we need kids with “good character traits.”

Coaches need kids with good character traits in order for a program to be successful.  Let me explain:

Lets say you’re a point guard who needs to get better beating the full-court press; specifically passing out of a 2-man trap.  You’re a walking turnover. Your team knows it and the opponents know it.

Unfortunately, your teammates all describe you using the following character traits:

He’s a good player but he’s pretty stubborn, arrogant, lazy and careless.

You tend to do your own thing and don’t always listen to the coaches (stubborn), you often think you’re better than you are (arrogant), most of your teammates outwork you (lazy) and you’re not very detailed and sharp (careless).

Traits Which Determine Success

Those traits are describing your character and those traits will determine your success.

So as a point guard who desperately needs to get better beating the full-court press and passing out of the 2-man trap; being a player who is stubborn, arrogant, lazy and careless, the chances of you getting better are slim.  You don’t possess the type of character that’ll help you improve.

Now lets reverse it: instead of stubborn, you’re coachable.  You’re not arrogant, you’re humble. Your teammates don’t describe you as lazy, but hardworking.  You aren’t careless, instead you’re detailed-oriented.

What are the chances a player with the following character (traits); coachable, humble, hardworking and detailed-oriented, will do what’s necessary to improve their game to beat the press and pass out of a 2-man trap?  Almost 100%.

There’s nothing in their character that would make me think otherwise.

Players with good character traits are the players coaching are searching for.  Your team needs players with good character traits in order to be successful.

How is your character?

What traits would your teammates use to describe your character?

Take a minute today and ask your coach this: “do you think I have the character traits needed to be successful?”

Taking a minute to examine your character, could be one of the best things you could ever do.

Get three FREE exercises to use with yourt team today by clicking on the image below!

Have fun and #LeadEmUp

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2025 Green 13 Recipients

The Green 13 Award celebrates student-athletes who lead with heart, uplift others, and consistently live out what it means to be a great leader.

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Watch the full video here: leademup.com/greenroom

What if the key to unlocking leadership potential in your team isn’t just about developing others, but about being the kind of person who is a joy to lead? In this episode, we dive into the often-overlooked truth: leadership flows best through people who are enjoyable to lead. You’ll learn the four traits of these individuals and how cultivating them can create a culture where leadership multiplies.

We’ll also explore a simple yet powerful question: Where are you today? Challenging, easy, or enjoyable to lead? Your answer could change everything about how you lead, and how others rise around you

Real Leadership Talk for Today’s Athletes

Green Room Ep. 3: Know Me to Lead Me – The Power of Connection on Championship Teams

Watch the full video here: leademup.com/greenroom

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Championship teams aren’t just talented, they’re connected. They build relationships deep enough to allow for honest feedback, accountability, and real growth. So why do most teams skip straight to “calling each other out” without laying the foundation? In this episode, we will explore the truth that you can’t challenge someone to be their best until you’ve earned their trust, and that trust only comes through genuine connection. This episode breaks down why peer leadership often fails in sports teams and how coaches and players can build the kind of culture where teammates lead each other effectively.

Download the Green Room Player Reflection Template, a simple PDF that coaches can use to have their players reflect on the episode. It’s perfect for sparking discussion and capturing key takeaways.

Download here: https://leademup.com/the-green-room-player-reflection-worksheet/

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Get access to part 1 of the Green Team Framework FREE!